Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a disorder that develops in some people who have experienced a shocking, scary, or dangerous event.
It is natural to feel afraid during and after a traumatic situation and I did.
February 2019,a friend and I was almost robbed at gunpoint by 2 guys on a bike, luckily for us,we narrowly escaped
November 2nd 2019 my phone was stolen,a Samsung Galaxy J7 phone that I really liked.
I was very pained and for the first time in my adult life,I cried in public.
December 2019,one of my elder sisters bought a new phone for me and being the clingy person I am,I quickly became very attached to the phone. Fastforward to 3rd February 2020 less than 2months after I started using the phone,I was robbed by 2 guys on a bike again!!!
I was going home that night by few minutes pass 8pm when a bike suddenly stopped beside me and the passenger quickly jumped down,pushed me into the roadside gutter and went for my phone.
After few seconds of the both of us struggling with me shouting,he overpowered me,took the phone, climbed back on the bike and they sped off.
For a few seconds I just stood there watching them drive off while being very confused.
I was still standing there trying to comprehend the fact that I was just robbed when some people gathered to ask me what happened.
After explaining what I happened,I left there,went home,locked myself in and cried my eyeballs out.
Fortunately for me,three of my friends offered their old phones to me to use till whenever I get a new one of my own ( I have the sweetest human beings as friends) and I had the opportunity to select one from the three to use and that was when my problem started.
I developed a fear of bikes most especially if there were more than just the rider.
I didn’t really pay much attention to it initially, I just avoided entering bikes,until it was becoming worse.
At first,when I am walking on the road and a bike starts coming towards me whether from my back or front,I will stop walking,stand still and stare at the bike till it passes.
Gradually it degenerated to me having palpitations whenever I’m walking on the road and bike comes close to me, palpitations with serious heart pounding.
All these while,I kept it all to myself. I felt no need telling anyone cause I told myself it won’t last.
Not only did it last,it became worse.
The palpitations and fright increased to the extent that if I was walking on the road and a bike comes close to me,I would start running. It didn’t matter if other people were on the road at the same time and I was being seen like a mad person,I ran like my life depended on it.
The last straw that broke the Camel’s back was I couldn’t leave my house again.
Then once it’s 5pm,I go indoors and lock myself in.
Between 8am to 12pm,my walking on the road is done with serious fear.
Given my position in my class,I was always on the move ergo I was always in constant fear and it dawned on me that I was in trouble.
It was no longer something I could keep to myself so I had to tell my elder sister about it one morning.
She spent a lot of time on the phone talking to me.
When it seemed like it wasn’t working,she tried forcing me to go the hospital to see if I could get a therapist to talk to (I wonder if my school teaching hospital even has that sort of therapists sef) and while I was willing to talk to someone about my problem,I was extremely scared of leaving my house that morning.
I can still remember how she promised to send me 5k that morning if I will go to the hospital and send her a picture of me talking to a doctor about my issue and for the first time in my life I told her to keep her money because I was too scared to leave my house
To her that was a huge cause for concern and she called my friend to come stay with me and to try get me to go to the hospital.
My friend came and we had a one on one talk after which he forced me out of my house that day.
The following day he called me by 5pm to meet him somewhere and we took a walk together.
It was a difficult walk for me cause I kept jumping at the sound of bikes but he held my hand everytime I jumped.
Gradually we kept pushing the time for the walk further and I started getting used to be outside again.
My fear started reducing untill I even forgot about it and I got back to my normal self.
Now I can walk by myself in the evenings without much fear just like before.
It was a very scary period for me but I’m glad it’s past.